War Within

Pain is all I can feel killing me every day Wrapped by walls thick and high, find myself in a cage When I have to say yes but behave otherwise Playing game to pretend being smart but not wise And the stone is so hard and the rule is so strict I’m helpless to break with my bloody smashed fists And I’d wish to cry out to let someone hear But choke down my tears whispering in despair I’ve been looking for reason to find common sense But life has proved to be a mess and nonsense I came here for love but was nourished on hate And nothing has changed and it’s still up to date And killing myself will make me survive Shall I be happy then staying alive? Dreams have been sold for comfort and wealth And no chance is left but losing my faith Duty and passion the engine of war And I hate to pray to the duty no more And I keep my passion which glows in my soul Destined to someone I’ll really know And each time again when I join the fight It appears I’m not on the winner’s side Exhausted to fade and bleeding to death I’m fiercely battling gasping for breath And I pull up myself whatever the cost While the war is still raging and it’s far to be lost Alexander Negreyev Minsk, Belarus December 2013